Recently, I overheard this conversation between my neighbors and it got me thinking about this whole concept of why our society freaks out when it comes to inter-caste marriages.
Inter- Caste Marriages
Aunty no.1: Oh, did you hear Sharmaji’s daughter had a love marriage, that too an intercaste?
Aunty no.2: Yes, I heard. Soon our kids would want to follow her steps; she’s such a disgrace to our society.
Have you noticed the word ‘disgrace’ they used to describe a girl who probably just married the love of her life? If she’s a disgrace, then I wonder what thieves, serial killers, rapists, and psychopaths are called in our society?
Also, did you know that just 5% of Indian marriages are inter-caste marriages? So this is going to be my attempt out of a million ones, to try and change this percentage and the definition of ‘disgrace’ that our society holds.
1) It’s not about WHAT they are; it’s about WHO they are
It’s time that some of our orthodox Indians realize that it’s not about the caste/religion someone belongs to, it’s about who they are as a person, it’s about their willingness to shower their partner with all their love and compassion, to be with them during the good, bad and messed-up times. And above all, it’s about how much happiness they bring to your daughter/son.
2) Society *sigh*
“Log kya kahengey” is probably the deadliest and of course, the shittiest line people can say to keep you out of getting into inter-caste marriages; and it doesn’t just end there. Just a single phrase like that has the ability to shatter your dreams into a million pieces and it’s going to continue doing until one of these days, we stop caring about what others have to say about our personal life. Can I get an Amen here?
Also, if you try to speak up against this, steel yourself from the shitstorm coming your way because of it.
Now it’s up to you. Meaningless comments by people who have no life of their own or the happiness of your son/daughter? What matters more?
Recommended Read: Right Time To Get Married: Society Vs Us
3) Let’s Talk About Evolution
You know how Heraclitus, the Greek philosopher said, ‘change is the only constant in life’. These people basically just refuse to make sense out of it. Living in a particular time zone, with the same traditions and way of living for forever is practically impossible. To give you a little extreme example, you know how species that don’t adapt to their changing environment, don’t survive for long. That’s pretty much the point, except for the fact that it is not about your survival, it’s about your pride in your so-called caste.
Go pick up today’s newspaper, check the date on it. Says 2016 huh? Now ADAPT!
4) Even Our Classics Supported Intercaste Marriages
Since childhood, we’re being taught about Mahabharata and Ramayana, no matter what caste we belong to. But did you know there have been a lot of instances of inter-caste marriages in Mahabharata?
Dushyant married Shakuntala, who was a Brahmin. Kshatriya king Shantanu married a low-born fisherwoman, Satyavati, Bheema married Hidimba, and this is just to name a few.
Recommended Read: Have Our Weddings Changed? Especially Indian Weddings
5) Keeping up With the World
We have reached beyond the moon, it is now possible to jump-start a brain out of a coma using ultrasounds, and space travel for an average man is becoming a reality. Living in a world which is progressing at such a fast pace, we continue to live in the 1940s where our main concerns involve our children getting married out of caste. Is this really the right way to go? Are we really making progress?
In the end, all that matters is the happiness of the people getting married; it shouldn’t be about the society, the caste, the ego and other factors that come with it. Love wins all! What about you? Do you also hate inter-caste marriages?